Accounting is Accrual Profession!
Get it? Accrual sounds like “a cruel”?
Yeah, I know, pretty bad. It’s one of those accounting puns that you’d expect Parks and Rec’s Ben Wyatt telling Barney Varmn and co. to side splitting laughter while the audience mentally thanks the guidance councilor who steered them away from accounting.
My parents got me a shirt that said that very line for Christmas last year, since I’m now a dad and tormented with the desire to tell such groan inducing one liners. On the plus side, I heard once that telling puns is a sign of intelligence, which must be true since it was a doctor who told me. And doctors are never, ever wrong.
While the socially responsible response to a bad pun is to pretend like it never happened, I decided to lean into this one a bit. Shortly after receiving the mis-branded shirt, I taught a training class to Grant Thornton’s new hires in an affluent suburb of Chicago (I could tell it was affluent because when I went there for training years before every house had a Mitt Romney sign in front of it). To mix things up, my cohost and I threw together a quick game and divided the room up into teams. Their first task was to come up with team names.
Their only requirement? Make sure it related to accounting, and that it was bad enough to make even us cringe.
When I first received the names, I had my blog on a brief hiatus. It took me until yesterday to remember that I hadn’t graced the world with these inspired phrases.
So here are the accounting puns, with a brief explanation for the few that need it:
Down for the Account
Accounting is my LIFO (If you’re not sure what LIFO is, I talk about it here)
Tax Manian Devils (from fellow Denverite Chase)
The Hot Assets (in the purely tax sense, a”hot asset” is a phrase for certain kinds of assets in a sale of a partnership)
Tax that Asset
Account Me Out
If you’re still alive after reading all those puns, congratulations. Feel free to use them at your next accounting mixer, since I stole them from my class anyway.
Have any to add to the list? Feel free to add them to the comments below.
Follow me @TimJGordon